Four Winds

At camp, soon to be heading down to dinner. Life at camp in a nutshell: busy, frustrating, magical, beautiful, exciting, rewarding, and topsy-turvy. Life outside of camp is partially scary and partially going so well that it is almost scary in its own way. There is much of the wondering of futures, and much of the planning of adventures, and much of the wishing that things were clearer and simpler, though I don't think I would have as many moments of complete contenment and joy in that version of my life. Lifeguarding and sunshine today. Tomorrow is packing and preparing.

3/31

I am sitting on a huge worn log, what remains of a retaining wall here at an old logging camp, looking out at a near relation of Hood Canal, a northwest fjord of depth and beauty. I think that my lips are sunburned for the weather is continuing to follow a fair and sunny pattern, though the wind against us today brought up old bad memories of why I dislike kayaking. However, we soldiered through it and traveled eight miles south to a camp where we could practice wet exits in a calm and protected environment. The wind is dying now as the land begins to cool for the evening and the calm seems to have fallen over land and sea kayakers alike. A fire has been lit behind me and birds call to each other across the still air, the sunlight sending last rays of hazy sweetness streaming through the marches of steep hills across from me. Ghee rice and lentils tonight. I have promised to try to teach my cook group more and to do less for them, a legit complaint. Wildlife today: an otter who found us as curious as we found it, and a doe and fawn on the water's edge attending to some secert task that only they know. To see the sea-edge grass set against these rotting pilings, softly nodding tufted heads is a type of music made solid. Salal grows here, and blackberry and salmonberry, but it is the wrong season for them all. I try not to share too much and to relax into being a member of the group and in most times, I succeed. I do not know how sore I will be tomorrow, yet. I had forgotten that exquisite moment of panic that arrives when yu realize that you are stuck upside down in the water and the agonizing second before remembering the way out of this mess. I hope for a solid night's sleep tonight and a french braid in the morning.

2/31

I don't feel as though I have been inspired to any great poetical heights of journal writing yet, but I will defend myself by saying the physical exertion and true wilderness section of this trip will not start until tomorrow, when you will see a boost in journal entry interest. However, today was out at 7am and in at 6pm by car and ferry, highway and logging road to a truly remote and beautiful town with snow capped peaks abounding and salt water at our feet. Originally a mill town, but now they just truck the logs out while. There is a campfire going and two social girls keeping the conversation flowing. I feel as though a more through packing list should be written for this course, for there are a number of things that I had to rent. Also silly things like mint extract and shower stuff, most unnecessary but happiness-promoting. Our two instructors, Ken and Gene are excellent and inoffensive, but I wish there was a female leader for me to study and question and bond with, also to help bond the group more. It will happen informally with time, but I know there are other soft-skill strategies. Dinner did not turn out as well as hoped, for too many cooks made me doubt my methods and I added milk which made the cheese stringy and the noodles soupy. Thank goodness I am not yet banned from the kitchen. I am tired though it is early yet and the alpenglow still bounces a warm pink glow into this tent and the evening birds still sing. I am worried that all my things will get wet. I am worried that I will be too weak to keep up. I talk too much and say stupid things. Let it go. Live in the moment.

1/31

Day One at NOLS Sea Kayaking and Sailing. At the HQ in Conway, WA for all of today, talking and prepping, meeting and getting a group feel, waiting through review and picking up a few ideas and tidbits of new information. Like to blow out the last flame of a whisperlite. And other things that seem to be blurring together for me at the moment. I am sitting in the library where I will not be distracted or cold and drooling at the collection of books and videos and papers behind me, wishing I had such easy access all the time so I could absorb some of the knowledge contained here. I suppose that I will have to learn by doing instead. Today started at4:45am and tomorrow will be a ten hour travel day--north and north and north and then finally west across Vancouver island. It's a more exotic location than I expected and I hope it is worth the effort to get there. So far the staff are enthusiastic, the food is good, the gear is quality, and the trip more cushy than I expected. The paddling will still be difficult, surely, but it is a thing I will face when it arrives. Hope for fair weather! Pleasant seas and skies and wind that blows in two weeks. There are several rooms here that are alluring. The library, of course, and the rations room with clean counters, an abundance of small plastic bags, and big bins of food. Also the gear room, which I tried not to spend much time in because I was afraid I would want it all. There is a group of backpackers prepping to go out too, and getting to overhear their process and travel plans has been interesting as well.

First Pictures from Sailing

First Pictures from Sea Kayaking

SKS

5:15 pm, Friday July 10th. I am sitting in the computer room, surrounded by mail, wearing new shoes, contemplating a new fancywork project for later this evening. Computer is loading pictures, Mariner's game is on in the background, and I am actually, despite all common sense, supremely happy right now. Twelve hours ago I woke up in Conway, WA, wet with dew and knowing it was useless trying to go back to sleep. Tea in the library, walking and talking, wrapping up and bidding farewell to my coursemates. Finally getting my Hug of War hug, with minimal awkwardness, driving home with my parents and Sam. Gifts and good food and a bath sometime soon. Most important of all, the possibility of adventures hovering in the near future keeps me looking forward. Pictures to come soon.

and on the wide sea rode a full-blowing sail

I promised myself that I would update this before I leave. Tomorrow. At an ungodly hour. And then it is off for packing and sorting and lectures and traveling, then paddling and soreness and hunger and not fitting in to the group, as per usual. Here's to hoping that all my fears are easily overcome, and that a whale does not decide to rise to the surface with my boat in the way.

"Sea-Fever"

I must down to the seas again, to the lonely sea and the sky,
And all I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by,
And the wheel's kick and the wind's song and the white sail's shaking,
And a grey mist on the sea's face, and a grey dawn breaking.

I must down to the seas again, for the call of the running tide
Is a wild call and a clear call that may not be denied;
And all I ask is a windy day with the white clouds flying,
And the flung spray and the blown spume, and the sea-gulls crying.

I must down to the seas again, to the vagrant gypsy life,
To the gull's way and the whale's way where the wind's like a whetted knife;
And all I ask is a merry yarn from a laughing fellow-rover
And quiet sleep and a sweet dream when the long trick's over.

By John Masefield (1878-1967).

Pictures from Seattle

WFR

Sorry so long. I've been in class from 8 till six, which results in running around from 7 till 8 and then collapsing in bed and falling asleep while the light is still shining outside. I'm a Wilderness First Responder now, and the happy owner of an Aerie Medical t-shirt, thanks to a strong score on the written examination. I'm hoping for some hot tubbing this evening to soak away the long day before I once again fall into a deep deep sleep.

testing

Ug. Not a good morning. I took the GRE, and did pretty well on the verbal, not so hot on the math, and I won't know about the writing for a while. I think I will have to take it again next year, though how I will improve my math score is debatable, as they aren't really testing math skills, just convoluted numbers skills. I'll know how to pace myself better anyhow. I'm glad it is done. That's all I have to say to that.

words of wisdom

I'm not going to the giant graduation ceremony in the Adams Center, so I will miss out on the inspirational speaker. But Timothy Egan more than makes up for it.

http://egan.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/05/06/dear-graduate/

pink and orange

I am very enamored of my resume at the moment. Cream linen press paper + tiny accent of spring color + excellent layout, content, yadda yadda. I don't want to give them away to my professors, who I am sure will immediately recycle them when my exit interview is over.

Yesterday was my last day of classes, but it was far too exhausting to enjoy or savor. However, I would like to say that I kicked butt on the second part of the Dendrology test, and I can't wait to go in next week to get my results. If my spelling is as good as I think it is, there was only one tree that I was not absolutely sure of. Stupid Juglandaceae and its bitter butter wal nuts.

I am currently wasting time before portfolio review, all dressed up with no where to go. I wanted to bring in my entire portfolio--all eight binders worth, but it weighs over thirty pounds and I'm in heels and a silk skirt. And rain threatens. I have thirty five cents with which to buy breakfast. I believe that is enough for a nutrigrain bar. Hmm.

dress

For you, pretty vintage graduation dress. I'm pretty sure it looks better in real life than in the pictures, which were taken in the bathroom, with horrible lighting. And I'm not wearing the right shoes. I'm not sure I have the right shoes, come to think of it. What goes well with a black grad gown and a light yellow cotton dress? I made the belt, as the dress had lost its own. It has a pretty floral pattern with is hard to see in photos. Also spent a great deal of time ironing it, with mostly good results, except that SOMEHOW the iron picked up some melty black goo halfway through and transferred it to the dress and I can't get it out. It isn't very noticeable, but I was very upset.

pictures of the day

enjoy.

advice

This is a very representative picture of me. Note the bemused expression.
From my perch in the chemistry building. It was snowing! Definitely not a lounge-on-the-oval day.
The room packing has begun. I need to buy some white thread, and borrow a iron and board. I've finished my little project for Teralyn. All Things Considered is giving me graduation advice. That is my status update.

finals

I am playing a game with the NPR archives where I type in a phrase that I am interested in, and then listen to the many stories it feeds back to me. I am designing a tshirt for a friend meantime. I have a test tomorrow. A test on tuesday. Three tests on next thursday. A final exit portfolio presentation on friday. Three tests during finals week. So if you were wondering what my life was like right now, I suggest you don't. It's too overwhelming. Perhaps I will clean some more this evening. Perhaps I will type up some more recipes for my summer tripper cook book. Or perhaps I will study for a test.

brandi carlile (correct spelling)

Walking from Higgins Alley to the Wilma. It was a longer walk than Morgan realized. I liked it though. 80 degrees yesterday! And my pretty red shoes (Three! compliments on the shoes, and all asked where they came from) aren't too bad for walking.
The Wilma is this beautiful old theater, falling apart, but still so interesting with big chandeliers and carvings and an organ and a decorative proscenium. Brandi liked it so much she decided to sing a song completely unplugged and walked out to the apron with the twins to do so. People stayed really quite and it was magical. In general there was great energy and people were there to listen to the music and the concert just clicked for the performers and the audience. At one point she broke us up into three parts and had us learn a three part harmony and I felt like it was summer camp on a Sunday in the lodge. Wonderful.
All set up and ready for the show. We chose to sit at the very front of the balcony, which we some mighty nice seats, and way more comfortable than standing in the crowd clustered at the stage.
A good night. I got to explain was bolognese sauce was, and gorgonzola, and gnocchi, and I had a glass of wine like a grown up with my chicken marsala, and my hair was wavy like it would be if I could tell my hair what I wanted it to do naturally. So despite too busy schedules and not enough time to relax, I would say that this was an excellent birthday present.

scenes from today

I'm going out tonight! Brandi Carlisle, and dinner. Pretty rockin'. The only catch is I wanted to go out to this nice restaurant that Morgan likes, but there isn't anything on the menu I eat.
Sunny day. Playing with color accent on the camera.
Being demo girl in Dendrology class. Here we are at Sitka mountain-ash.
Ready for tree class!
This is about half of the trees we are supposed to know by now!

first photos